Is negative thinking holding you back?

February 17, 2017

There is plenty of research available that shows that women are bad negotiators when it comes to getting what they want. Whether it’s a pay rise, a promotion or better working hours â€“ we seem to be somewhat lagging compared to our male counterparts. One of the biggest reasons why we choose to be happy with our lot on the outside, and disappointed and resentful on the inside is that we’re afraid that being â€˜pushy’ and asking for what we want will make our colleagues not like us. Men on the other hand, don’t seem to have this issue.

Is this something we can work on? We think so. Follow our advice for becoming a better negotiator through eliminating negative thinking and lets start focusing on how to get what you want!

Don’t settle

Too many women will easily settle for what they have rather than aiming higher. Being just as talented and intelligent as our male counterparts, why shouldn’t we ask for more? If you have career aspirations or you’re looking for a salary increase â€“ go for it. Be confident and graceful about what you’re asking for, in most cases they’ll be surprised that you spoke up in the first place, and will certainly respect you for it.

Think like a man

In today’s society, you will still find that even though a man and woman have the same roll, a man will often earn more. Why? Because he wasn’t afraid to ask for it. When you get a new job, a promotion or reach your annual review, don’t be afraid to ask for a rise or to negotiate different terms to your contract. Don’t be afraid to aim higher out of fear of being seen a cold, money grabbing or other negative words which wouldn’t be associated with a man in the same position. Convince yourself that you are worth more, and others will believe it too.

Do your research

In order to negotiate, you’re going to need to back up your arguments. Show examples of when you’ve excelled in your role, from meeting sales targets to successful completion of projects and more, having a tonne of evidence behind you to support your demands will not only show that you are in control and have considered your situation carefully, but also demonstrate your skills and achievements to others.

Don’t ignore your feminine traits altogetherâ€¦

Just because men are more forthcoming about what they want, doesn’t mean that you should ignore your good traits altogether. Being friendly, empathetic and organised will also help you to go a long way in making an impression and helping you to get what you want.

If you’re struggling with confidence at work or you want to learn how to negotiate better, there are courses you can do to help boost your skills both face to face and online. Having a mentor is another great idea to help you develop your career and to share your thoughts and aspirations with. As you progress in your role you will find it much easier to start asking for what you want. You deserve your success as much as any man, so aim high and reach for the stars.